Mary Bellamy

Several months ago, Pernon Ricard started marketing Soho, a lychee-flavored liqueur. I love lychee, and especially love lychee martinis, but have never been able to reproduce them well at home. Perhaps trying to puree vodka and lychees in a blender isn't the best plan, but you can't blame a girl for trying. Of course, when I heard that someone was distributing lychee liqueur in the United States, I was all over it. Well, I was all over it in a roundabout fashion.

The manufacturers decided to begin test marketing the beverage in Philadelphia in August 2005.. They then expanded to San Francisco, and that's where the lychee trail came to a grinding halt. Although the company promises a full national rollout by the end of 2006, I'm nothing if not impatient. And so, a plan was formed.

I convinced a friend [we'll call him "Jake"] who was going to the Philadelphia area to bring me back two bottles. When he arrived, he proceeded to the nearest state-run liquor store only to discover that Soho had to be special-ordered and would not arrive before his return to Fairbanks. Boo!

And then came the second plan. "Jake" would be traveling to the West Coast in June, along with another friend we’ll call "Stanley." Moreover, one of "Jake's" friends would be traveling out to meet them. ["Jake" has a friend named Cookie. No quotes because that is apparently her real name. That has nothing to do with the story.] And so it was decided that "Jake's" friend would smuggle out two bottles of Soho, and "Stanley" would become the mule who carried the bottles across the Canadian border and deliver them to me in Fairbanks. It is worth noting that there's nothing illegal about Soho, I just happen to like pretending that there is.

Several months after the plan was hatched - Sunday, to be precise - my doorbell rang. "Stanley" stood, there, bearing my contraband. Four months. $40 (I'll send you a check, "Jake"). Patience far beyond my natural capacity. It will all be worth it when I mix up a lychee martini tonight.